“Sooo… you come here of– no, that’s such a bad line, give me a minute.”
Summary:
If Dean Winchester is one thing, its straight. So what if two dudes being bros just want to help each other out with some definitely heterosexual hand jobs? Its all cool as long as you say “no homo” after.
Written for the June Gabriel Monthly Challenge
Tags: Debriel (DeanxGabriel), NSFW, Sexuality Crisis, Bottom Dean, Sam trying to figure out how his brother is such an idiot
Author’s Note: So, this was born out of a friend telling me about her SINGLE dad and his “definitely straight” friendship with another SINGLE dude, and how he hasn’t been on a date in years and instead chooses to spend every waking moment with his BRO. I knew immediately that I had to write that for Dean and Gabriel. This is also my FIRST Debriel fic and contains the best line of dialogue I have ever written: “I’m straight, and if I have to suck your dick to prove that, I’ll fucking do it.” Enjoy, y’all!
Written for the Sincerely Sam Club on Supernatural Amino
Prompt: Relationships.
Summary: Most people have fond memories of past loves, All Sam has is regrets.
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1. Jess
Jess was like spring, warm and welcoming the beginning of something wonderful. Sam felt alive when he was with her, shedding his old life like a baby bird breaking out of its shell. He was a new person when he was with her, someone who had never killed a vampire, or almost watched his brother die. With Jess, he was normal, a college boy whose biggest worry was failing his chemistry test. Jessica loved him unabashedly, and he loved her the same way, with the passion of a first love that he was sure would be his last.
And then she burned on the ceiling.
2. Madison
Madison was like fall, brisk and tart and exciting. She was the first person he’d felt anything for since he lost Jess, a completely different flavor than the one he had gotten so used to. She made him want to believe that the monsters he’d grown up to fear could be people like anyone else, that they could live normal lives, even fall in love. She tasted like the first breath of autumn when he kissed her, like the smokiness of a bonfire. Madison came alive in his hands, and she made him feel more alive than he had in months. In her, he had hope that he wasn’t completely broken.
And then she asked him to kill her.
3. Sarah
Sarah was like winter, a bright snowy sunset of a woman. She was every bit as beautiful as the art displayed displayed in her father’s gallery. And she was clever too, didn’t sit back and let Sam and Dean save her from the cursed painting that was wreaking havoc. She put herself at risk, in order to get to the bottom of what was going on. Sam couldn’t say that for everyone. He tried to stop his feelings for her from growing, knowing what would happen. People who he cared about only ended up dead, he hadn’t accounted on her returning his feelings. He let himself enjoy a couple days with her, hoping beyond all hope that someday, he could go back for her.
And then she died.
4.Ruby
Ruby was like summer, hot, brutal and unrelenting. She was addictive in a way he hadn’t tasted before, enticing him down to the very soul. He knew he should stay away from her, he had known from the beginning what she was and what she was capable of, but he didn’t care. There was something freeing about being with her, ignoring the rational part of his brain and do what felt good for once in his life. She was always up for anything, always ready to do what needed to be done, even if it wasn’t the best way. He felt like she was the only one who understood him, the only one who knew what he really was.
And then she betrayed him.
5. Amelia
Amelia was like spring, like a second chance, like the rebirth of his perfect life. Dean was gone, and he’d told Sam not to look for him. Sam didn’t know how he could even begin to put his life back together, and then he hit a dog. Just another bad thing in a string of bad things that always happened to him, and then he met Amelia. Before he knew it, they were living together, living the kind of live he had always dreamed of. He told her about Dean and she told him about Don, and together they began gather the broken pieces of their respective lives, and used them to build a new one together. But Dean came back, and there was no room for Sam.
And then he left her.
+1. Gabriel
Gabriel was like no one Sam had ever known before. He was power and energy wrapped in an enigma, and Sam had barely even begun to scratch the surface. He hated Gabriel and he admired him. Gabriel had tortured him, played on his pain, but he had also help him see his faults, and in the end, Sam forgave him. But it was too late, by the time Sam realized the depth of his feelings for the archangel, he was lying dead on the floor of a dirty motel. He’d gone up to bat for them, thrown himself into the fire, and paid with what he’d been running from his entire existence.
Sam had lost so many people he loved, it was hard to say which one had hurt the most. But this one, this hurt in a different way, because Gabriel never knew how he felt about him, and now he never would.
Sam buried whatever had been growing between them in the graveyard of his past loves, with all the others, and kept moving forward.
things that are never mentioned ever in supernatural now but had major psychological impact on sam:
– he watched his girlfriend (potential fiancée) burn to death (and he had nightmares about it in the first couple episodes of s1 and probably still to this day)
– he was forced to watch so many people die through his premonitions
– especially during the first couple seasons, he was constantly seen as a freak/monster (hunted by gordon, immune to croatoan virus, bullied by dean)
– meg used his body to assault the hunter, jo, and dean
– he had to shoot the first girl he opened up to romantically since jess’s death
– he carries the weight of dean’s demon deal and blames himself (and had to watch as his brother was ripped to shreds)
– he was on drugs and depressed and suicidal and basically a full-time alcoholic while dean was dead
– ruby (someone he trusted!!) manipulated him into becoming an addict and breaking the last seal (which he entirely blames himself for) (even though dean broke the first seal in hell) (and he was only in hell because HE made the crossroads deal)
– a ghoul who looked like adam, his newly found brother, sliced his arms open like he was an animal (this was LITERALLY never mentioned again)
– sam’s detox is almost never mentioned and it was extremely emotionally and physically painful
– lucifer is generally seen as evil, right? well sam was told that he is lucifer’s perfect vessel and he believes that he is inherently evil bc of this
– in ‘swap meat’ gary used sam’s body to have sex
– sam has to live with all of the people his soulless body hurt (and dean berated him the entire season for not having a soul) (which wasn’t his fault in any way, shape, or form)
– cas, someone else that he trusted, broke the wall in his head causing hallucinations of his centuries in lucifer’s cage
– non con with becky. i don’t have to say anything else.
– his lucifer hallucinations tortured him to the point of refusing to sleep and eat… he was in a mental hospital for crying out loud!!!!!
– the first girl he kissed after jess was killed was killed by crowley
– THEY NEVER TALK ABOUT THE TRIALS WHICH LITERALLY LED SAM TO SAY “SO?” WHEN HE WAS TOLD THAT HE’S GONNA DIE
– AND WHEN DO THEY DISCUSS GARDEEL NOW?? never!!!! dean tricked sam into accepting a being into him that he KNEW sam wouldn’t say “yes” to because of his past experience with lack of autonomy.
– and gadreel used sam’s body to kill people, including kevin who they thought of as a brother (and sam has said that he wakes up seeing his hands killing kevin)
– sam was willing to die when cas was extracting grace
– sam refused to give up dean’s location at the beginning of s10 to cole, even though dean was a demon
– SAM WAS TORTURED BY COLE. WHY IS THIS NEVER BROUGHT UP???
– sam was verbally abused by demon! dean (i know dean was a demon but sam was visibly shaken when he was talking about mary)
– once again, sam was willing to die in ‘the werther project’ and basically slit his own wrist
– sam obviously vomited after seeing charlie’s dead body
– dean wouldn’t even allow sam to speak at charlie’s funeral and was told that he should be the dead one
– sam was brutally beaten by his brother in “brother’s keeper” and was ONCE AGAIN ready to die
– sam was sick with the darkness virus at the beginning of s11 and cured himself + other infected people WITHOUT ANYBODY’S HELP
– sam willingly approached lucifer for help with amara, despite being tortured for centuries
– SAM WAS TORTURED FOR SEVERAL DAYS AT THE BEGINNING OF S12 (INCLUDING NON CON) and then worked with his abuser for the remainder of the season
– *whispers* and sam being killed by the vamp at the end of s13 will probably not be mentioned again :’))))))
In the Beginning -Gabriel’s Origins: Part 2
Summary: Gabriel had always been aware the Michael and Lucifer were a little different than the rest of them. Everything about them was black or white, right or wrong, up or down. There was no middle ground, no shades of gray with the two oldest of his brothers. When they loved, it was absolute, and nothing would sway them from that course, but they fought with the same ferocity.
This was written as the second part of @archangelgabriellives‘s 2400 followers celebration. Thank you Alison for this wonderful challenge, I had so much fun writing it and I can’t see where it goes from here!
~~~~~~~~~
Gabriel had always been aware the Michael and Lucifer were a little different than the rest of them.
Everything about them was black or white, right or wrong, up or down. There was no middle ground, no shades of gray with the two oldest of his brothers. When they loved, it was absolute, and nothing would sway them from that course, but they fought with the same ferocity.
When they first started fighting, Gabriel had simply shrugged it off as something that happened, angels fought all the time, but they got more and more frequent and worse and worse in intensity.
It got to the point where they shook all of Heaven. The other angels cowered, hiding in clusters, talking in frightened whispered as if Michael or Lucifer could hear them. Gabriel wanted to, he wanted to run and run until he couldn’t hear it, but the others were looking to him for guidance, and despite the fact that each shout made his knees quake, he pretended like it was beneath his notice.
His father didn’t seem to notice, so Gabriel tried to put it behind him.
Between his shouting matches with Michael, Lucifer was growing restless. He paced Heaven like a caged animal, one moment open and friendly and the next, sending their siblings scrambling with the barest of glances. Gabriel tried to keep him busy, hoping beyond all hope that he could reach him, to pull him back from the edge where he was so precariously teetering before it was too late. That was how Gabriel ended up learning magic.
It had started with just a few simple things, creating small objects, sleight of hand tricks that were only good for a laugh, and Lucifer was more than happy to teach him. The other angels stayed away from him, too intimidated by his reputation or too scared of displeasing Michael to even try. But Gabriel wasn’t scared of his brother.
Lucifer stood in the heavenly grove where they had chosen to practice, his empty hand held out in front of him.
“Watch closely,” he instructed, his voice steady and even.
Gabriel stared into his brother’s palm and watched in awe as a butterfly manifested itself out of thin air. It fluttered its wings gently, before taking off into the air.
“The trick is not making them too perfect,” Lucifer explained. “Little imperfections here and there, but not enough to really draw the eye. You try.”
Gabriel held out his hand, pushing his grace down his arm and out his hand, just like Lucifer had taught him. He closed his eyes and another butterfly appeared in his palm, wings brushing gently against his fingers.
Lucifer bent forward, examining the creature with a discerning eye. “Good…for a first try,” he grinned, and it was almost like the old Lucifer was looking back at him, instead of the monster who had all but replaced him. “Let’s try something a little harder.”
Lucifer stood back from him, his wings stretched out wide behind him. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. With his exhale, a doppelgänger faded into view next to him.
Gabriel couldn’t contain his awe. “Oh my Dad!” He exclaimed, circling the double in excitement. It was his brother up and down, through and through. There was not a single difference that he could spot. “How did you… what?….why?…I don’t even care!” He laughed. “Teach me!”
Lucifer returned his laughter. “It’s the same as the butterfly,” he explained, snapping his fingers. Another double appeared next to the second, but this one was their brother Raphael. “Why don’t you try? Do Michael.”
“M-Michael?”
His brother’s face lost its relaxed look, tightening his mouth into a straight line. “Yes, Michael,”
“I could do myself first…or Castiel…or…”
“Michael,” Lucifer insisted, stepping closer to him.
Gabriel couldn’t hesitate again, he knew that if he did, Lucifer would get angry and that was exactly what he was trying to avoid. He snapped his fingers quickly, hoping that if he did it, the Lucifer he loved would return.
His Michael popped into existence, looking almost as menacing as the original. Lucifer grinned, but there was no warmth in his smile, only a manic sort of intensity.
Gabriel was relieved when Jeremiah appeared over a cloudbank, flying as if his very life depended on it.
“What do you want?” Lucifer growled as their brother landed, his eyes darting questioningly at the Michael double that was standing next to Gabriel.
“M-m-Michael said to fetch you…sir,” Jeremiah told him, looking down and not meeting Lucifer’s angry gaze. “He…he wanted you to come at once.”
Gabriel could feel the rage pulsing off his brother like a typhoon, dark, intense and unpredictable. It made him want to throw up.
“Tell Michael, I will be there soon,” Lucifer replied through gritted teeth, dismissing Jeremiah with a wave of his hand. Jeremiah made himself scarce.
He was barely out of sight when Lucifer exploded.
“Who does he think he is?!” He raged, every trace of the calm he’d been exhibiting when they’re started wiped from his face. “That he can beckon me to his side like a dog? I am not one of his cronies!”
“Lu, I know. He doesn’t mean it like that-“ Gabriel tried, but Lucifer would not be stopped.
“I am his equal, not his subordinate!” Lucifer screamed. “He has gotten prideful. He thinks he’s Father!”
“He’s not Dad,” Gabriel pleaded. “It’s okay, it’s …Lu, please-“
Gabriel watched in horror as Lucifer withdrew his blade, and sunk it into the double Michael’s chest, watching with twisted joy as he contorted in pain and expired, light shooting out of his eyes. Lucifer held the double while he died, twisting his blade until there was no more pain to be drawn.
He pulled his blade out, wiping it on his tunic as the double melted into nothingness. He fixed Gabriel with a dark stare, as if challenging him to say or do anything, but Gabriel was frozen, watching the monster wearing his brother’s face.
“Now,” Lucifer composer himself, his angry countenance melting into one of a penitent. “If you’ll excuse me, I have our brother to attend to.”
~~~~~~~
By the time Lucifer summoned Gabriel for his next lesson, Lucifer was in a much better mood. Michael had been away from Heaven on some mission from their Father, and in his absence, Lucifer was calm and relaxed.
“Have you been practicing?” Lucifer asked Gabriel, reclining on a cloud in a different glade than last time. Gabriel thought it best to get as far away from the rest of his siblings as possible. They didn’t understand.
“I have,” Gabriel grinned at him. He’d been practicing incessantly since the last time, hoping he could distract Lucifer with his progress. He snapped his fingers, and a double of himself appeared beside them.
Lucifer’s eyebrows shot up, he looked impressed, if only for a moment as he circled Gabriel’s double. “Good,” he nodded. “You’re doing great, Gabe,”
“I’m just getting started,” Gabriel challenged, snapping his fingers three times more. Doubles of himself, Raphael and Michael fell in line besides the first.
His brother hesitated for just a moment, and Gabriel’s hearted swelled with pride. He could tell that he’d caught his brother off guard, but he wasn’t through quite yet. He snapped once more.
A double of their father appeared.
“Gabriel…” Lucifer whispered, reaching out to touch their Father gently on his face. “You’ve truly outdone yourself,” he said with a grin. “Now, the true test… make them speak… all of them.”
Gabriel swallowed. He’d been expecting Lucifer to test him like this, doubles weren’t doubles unless they could speak and act like the original after all, but could he make them all speak at once?
He took a deep breath and concentrated, reaching out with his grace just like Lucifer had taught him. This was no different than the butterfly, he told himself, no different at all. Lucifer believed in him, always believed in him, even if Michael and Raphael looked down on him, and he would show him he was worthy of his confidence.
The doubles began conversing with each other, each of them in a voice that sounded identical to their own. Gabriel flashed Lucifer a smile, reveling in the look of approval his brother gave him.
“Well…” came a voice from behind them. “That was… fascinating.”
They both turned with a start to find Michael and Raphael standing behind them. Raphael looked almost thunderstruck, but Michael, Michael was wearing a look that made Gabriel want to run and hide.
“So this is what you’ve been teaching him, brother?” Michael asked. “This blasphemy?”
“It’s none of your business,” Lucifer shot back, his wings flaring out behind him. “Not everything needs your approval.”
Michael kept a straight face. “With Father gone-“
“You aren’t Dad, Michael,” he yelled. “Stop trying to be!”
Gabriel tensed. Even though Michael looked calm, Gabriel could tell from his posture he was seething. No one talked back to him, least of all his brother.
“Lucifer, I’m sure you didn’t mean that,” he said calmly. “I’ll give you time to …compose yourself,”
Lucifer’s lip twitched. “I meant every word,” his blade slid into existence.
“Brother, don’t make me do this,” Michael sighed, his own blade appearing in his hand.
“No one makes us do anything,” Lucifer snarled.
Gabriel couldn’t take it anymore. “Stop!” He screamed, getting between them. “Both of you just stop!”
Neither of his brothers moved, their eyes on him, each gaze different but the same in their intensity.
“Gabriel…” Michael addressed him. “There’s no reason to get upset, Lucifer was just-“
“No, Michael,” Gabriel would not be silenced. He couldn’t do this, something was broken in his family and he had to do something about it. “You’ve both changed,” he shouted. “Dad wouldn’t want this!”
“Well Dad isn’t here anymore, is he?” Lucifer growled, keeping one eye on Gabriel and the other on Michael and Raphael.
“Whose fault is that?” Michael retorted. “We all know he left because of you!”
Gabriel could listen to no more, he launched himself into the sky, away from his brothers, away from everything he loved and held dear. He didn’t know how much more of this he could take.
He had tried time and time again to make them stop fighting. He’d tried talking to them each of them, he’d tried talking to both of them, he’d even tried having Raphael talk to them but nothing ever stuck. They always promised they would stop, but they never did for long. The feeling of helplessness blossomed in his gut as he flew, knowing that one day this would all come to a head.
Some day, some day soon, they would go too far. It made him sick just to think of it, it would be more than he could bear, and there was nothing he could do to avoid it.
One of them would kill the other and Gabriel, Gabriel would be forced to watch it all
… unless….
Lucifer found him hours later, curled up under his wings in a forgotten corner of heaven, still trying to get the anger in his brothers’ voices out of his head.
“Gabe?”
Gabriel looked through his wings at his brother.
“Michael and I, we’re sorry,” he said, laying a hand on Gabriel’s back. “We didn’t mean it, it’s…hard with Dad being gone…it won’t happen again.”
Like every time they’d said it before, Gabriel knew that was a lie.
He would be forced to watch one of his brothers die, felled by the other’s hand.
I Aim To Misbehave 